Personal Growth

  • Coaching Services

    You have the potential to be perfectly aligned - mentally, emotionally and physically. Physical health is the cornerstone for a good life. Lifestyle, environment and genetics are not the only things that influence your bodily well-being. Your thoughts and emotions have an equal (if not greater) impact.

    My coaching approach is thus not only about creating positive shifts and facilitating change in thinking and emotional experience, but also to ensure that underlying physical issues don't get in the way of what you desire to achieve.

    I am not referring to physical ailments where medical treatment is indicated, but rather to those things that are less observable, that may prevent you from having the necessary energy to pursue that which is would support your growth. This is discussed in more detail on the pages dealing with Life Skills and Energy Treatment.

    Change is an example of one of the things that may not only affect you on an emotional level, giving rise to fear and anxiety, but could also affect how you think about yourself and your ability to cope, and even more critically, give rise to bodily problems, most commonly seen in, for example, digestive ailments.

    If your situation indicates such problems, without clearing such physical reactions, that which you can achieve mentally and emotionally may be undermined. And clearing the effects of stress hormones and the build-up of toxins, which may even be expressed through ailments such as headaches, inflammation and food allergies allow you to focus your energy on the areas where deeper and longer lasting results can be realized.

    This is what I mean by following a "whole person" approach in coaching.

    Achieving Wholeness

    When necessary, clearing the reactions which have led to problems on a physical level can be seen as a basic step in overall healing and growth. Don’t be fooled into thinking that this is not powerful – it can bring huge relief within a relatively short period of time – with symptoms disappearing quickly and your energy being restored to a level that allows you to deal with the emotional and mental demands you set for yourself.

    Releasing emotional distress and limiting beliefs would be equally important, i.e. learning to master your thoughts so that you can deal with setbacks, difficulties or achieve the growth you desire.

    And lastly, but again, equally important, is to empower yourself with the tools and positive habits to maintain a clear mind and a state of calm even when you encounter challenges, so that you are able to direct your thinking purposefully, solve problems as they arise, challenge yourself to reach your goals in all the areas of your life and even, to give your inner voice the scope to guide your decisions.

    The Reality of Change

    We are constantly challenged by new uncertainties. You can be as sure of having to adapt as you are of being subject to the law of gravity, or of seeing the sun rise in the morning.

    Change never stops, whether it is forced upon you by external factors or whether you make the choice to transform your life yourself. Resisting, insisting that things need to stay the same from day to day will only lead to disappointment and despair. Those with the most flexibility adapt to external demands without experiencing the hardships felt by those who resist the process. And the more flexible you are, the greater the chance that you yourself will be driven to introduce changes, big or small, in your own life.

    And should you want to transform yourself, it is important to achieve total clarity on the matter. Unless you have a crystal clear view of what your ultimate objective is, you could end up chasing the wind.

    Initially most of my clients indicate that they want to transform themselves to be better, to feel better, to do better or to relate better to others. Once we unpack that desire and define exactly what the real goal is, then progress begins.

    Personal Choice or External Demands

    We all know that not all changes are driven by personal choice. External factors can force us to face things that are unwelcome and threatening (for example, divorce or redundancy).

    Where it is forced upon you, you may experience the change as a serious threat - on all levels, i.e. physically, emotionally, mentally and even spiritually.

    Simply resigning yourself to external demands won't necessarily reduce the effect of those threats. The internal resistance and pain you feel, despite hiding it away, could erode your peace of mind and in turn, create the physical tension that literally eats away at your insides.

    Unless you are willing to face your fears and to risk failure (and thus learning) you could remain a victim of your circumstances.

    It is only by fully integrating the change that you truly adapt.

    And if it is impossible for you to accept the change, being soul destroying in your view, then victimhood can only be avoided by considering what your alternatives are and making new plans.

    Obviously it is far easier to embrace transformation if you do it by choice and drive the process yourself. Even by choice, transforming yourself, your circumstances or your world can be a challenging process.

    The aim of developmental coaching is to guide you through this process, with the least pain for the most gain.

    Whether you need to adapt to new circumstances or whether you yourself made the decision to introduce the change, adopting these principles can make the process less painful:

    Easing the process:

    First, you need to have the will to integrate the shift within your own psyche. Resisting is natural, even when you initiated the process. There comes a point in time when you have to adapt or stagnate. The more stuck you become, the more difficult it is to escape from emotional or situational difficulties. Thus, step one is to accept and to make a new plan. And if you are intending making changes yourself, the less you procrastinate, the easier it would be to move forward.

    Secondly, set realistic expectations. Disappointment frequently follows when you expect instant and spectacular results. This can result in blame, shame, anger or anxiety. Such disappointment would affect your mental state, making you less resilient. It could also affect other aspects of your life, such as finances, relationships, career prospects, etc.

    The third principle relates to the willingness to honestly evaluate yourself and to develop the specific skills and get the tools you need to successfully go through the transformation process. This will also contribute to setting realistic expectations. You need to be prepared to engage in self-exploration – evaluating your personality, your capabilities, your behaviour, your thoughts, your beliefs and your habitual emotional responses.

    Change will call upon you to be patient, to have determination, to consistently work towards your desired outcome, to face obstacles, to solve problems and to be flexible. Should you lack these qualities you need to take steps to acquire them, which would also need to be part of your process and your plan.

    My goal is to help you to master these aspects without getting stuck, overwhelmed or falling into the emotional trap of self-doubt, anxiety or shame.

    For the most gain, here are some more tips:

    • You need to be clear about the changes you are making. Most people only have a vague idea of that which they are dissatisfied with or that which they want to improve, but do not invest effort in clearly specifying their requirements or needs.
    • You have to define what this will mean for you and you need to spell it out. Clarity is king.
    • You need to realise that change involves a process of learning, experimenting and growing and that it is not an event.
    • You need to accept that you are embarking on a process that will require you to systematically and in a step-wise manner execute specific actions if you are to reach your end goal.
    • When you know what you want to change and what you want in the place of what you currently have, you need a plan that lends itself to step-wise execution. Commitment is key. Be prepared to encounter obstacles, so that you are prepared to persevere when the going gets tough.
    • It would be easier to overcome the challenges of change or transformation should you not only focus on external factors, but also give enough attention to your personal beliefs, emotions, attitude and thoughts.
    • Also, allowing yourself time to relax and re-energise will ensure that you can manage the pace by maintaining your physical health – even when things get very hard.

    During the coaching process, we ensure that we focus adequately on all these things, allowing you to find direction, experience consistent and sustainable results and maintain momentum. Not only that, but also to learn more about yourself, to find peace and to create a future that is even more satisfying than what it was before.

    Whether you desire to make changes for the better - personally or otherwise - or are facing an unwelcome changes, you can take the first step by booking a coaching discussion with Ricka at the Yemanya Office. CLICK HERE to arrange a convenient time.

  • Life Change: Trap or Choice

    The more willing you are to explore and experiment and to try on new roles, behaviour and ways of thinking, the more options you will have to overcome challenges and embrace change, and the greater the benefit will be that you derive from the process! Change is always a challenge, propelling us out of our comfort zones.

    For most of us it is accompanied by feelings of indecision, discomfort and in some cases, distress.

    Discomfort is mostly seen as a negative emotion – but what would happen if it is regarded as a way to thrust you into action or propelling you forward?

    The more success you experience in managing life change, the more your confidence increases and the more willing you become to expand your experiences even further, providing opportunities to apply new knowledge, behaviour and roles that will enable more variety, accomplishment and satisfaction.

  • Personal Life Coaching

    From managing negative emotions such as anger and jealousy, to learning how to connect more deeply in our relationships or overcoming issues such as procrastination and feeling stuck, preventing us from moving forward, personal coaching is all about helping you breakdown in a step-wise manner, where you are heading and determining what the action steps are that you need to take to get to your intended outcome.

    We are continuously changing and growing; life's challenges may be self-initiated or may be caused by circumstances outside of your control. As you face changes, life coaching allows you to resolve difficulties, eliminate obstacles or reach the outcomes that you desire, often at an accelerated pace.

    Whether you desire to achieve a specific goal and need to find the tools to allow you to get to your intended goal as quickly as possible or desire to change your thought patterns, the way you behave or feel, but you are unsure about how to get to the end result in the best possible way, you can discover the HOW in the coaching process. 

    Considering all your options, weighing different opportunities and focusing clearly on the different ways to get to what you desire, prepare you to achieve what you want in a focused manner. In this way, you can leverage the new and exciting opportunities by choosing the best possible path towards pursuing that purpose.

    By tackling desired but challenging goals in a systematic fashion, overcoming each obstacle by applying the techniques you will master one by one, you can place yourself in a position where you are taking charge of your life and realise your dreams.

    Unexpected Upheavals

    Change is inevitable, but it is not always sought after. In some instances it may present new and exciting opportunities but it may also seem as if the worst possible fate has befallen you.

    Should you feel trapped in the issues, events, insecurities, disappointments and emotions of the past, in the long term your energy will be drained as you attempt to keep those things in check. Clearly considering your present situation and options or preparing to overcome the obstacles you face is a far better way to deal with these type of challenging changes.

    Even if you cannot see the sense in what you are experiencing now, it often has the potential of directing your towards a more fulfilling future. That does not mean that your sense of loss is not real or serious, or that relief will be instant, but it is far better to work through the loss and ready yourself for a different reality, than isolating yourself within your pain.

    Finding meaning and direction

    Coaching allows you to unpack all the relevant aspects that is necessary in establishing your journey, with the least number of obstacles. It guides you in the process of learning new skills to deal with a variety of themes in your life, devising plans and action steps. You can progress at your own pace, applying your own unique style of learning and acting without being defined by unwanted thoughts, emotions or circumstances.

    The future need not be threatening for you. Your hopes and ideals deserve some attention. You need not allow emotions such as powerlessness, defeat, doubt, anger, anxiety or other limiting feelings to become your way of life.

    It is important to remember that even in the face of unbelievable adversity, many people have proven that they can turn dreams into reality, adversity into opportunity, misfortune into prosperity, heartache into bliss and hopelessness into peace of mind. You can do that too!

    If you are able to imagine that, or find the faintest hope within your heart that it could be true for you, you have taken a small step forward on your journey.

    If so, why not take the next small step by booking your first coaching discussion, either via Skype, telephone or in person at the Yemanya office? CLICK HERE to arrange a convenient time.

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